Mom's Story
We share this story only to help others as that is what my son wants to do.
In 2004 my husband and I were blessed with a beautiful baby boy. As the years went by, everything seemed fine. He was happy, beautiful, and smart. Having only one child can present some challenges for a parent. For instance, we had nothing to compare him to in the world of "normal". It's normal for boys to be active, not sit still, fight, express themselves clearly, write neatly.... the list goes on and on. When Piers was a toddler I noticed he wouldn't make eye contact. I assumed it was that he was so busy taking everything else in and our doctor didn't seem concerned, so I let it go but worked with him everyday to look at me when I was talking. I thought I was teaching him how to be polite. A short while later he woke up one morning and we couldn't understand anything that he said. Something wasn't right but all of the "experts" told us he was fine. Fast forward to school. He loved it. He fidgeted, but he loved it. He did well academically and any concerns I had were met with "He's fine. It's normal. That's just boys." But something wasn't right. I asked our doctor again about his fidgets. I asked his school about his handwriting. "He's fine. It's normal."
In second grade he encountered a bully in his classroom. We fought to protect our child. We filled out the report and were sent on our way. Any concerns we as parents voiced were quickly silenced. One afternoon, I had the pleasure of watching my son walk out of school crying and his teacher looking at me concerned. She had finally seen something. While the whole school was standing outside waiting for their parents in the carpool to pick them up, she confronted both boys. Mind you, mine is crying and everyone from first grade up to eighth grade is outside. She didn't remove them, she was frustrated and well, wouldn't you know it, my son can't respond quickly enough for her to believe him. Nothing was done, nothing was resolved, and my son went home more defeated than ever. We removed him from that school after Christmas.
The next year and a half was spent figuring out where he was academically and trying to help him learn how to accept challenges. I applaud his teacher during this time and we wouldn't be where we are now if it weren't for her! We had taken Piers to see a therapist after the bully incident to help him cope and learn how to handle these types of things. Her immediate response to our child was, "You know he has Asperger's, right?" Let's just say that once again, the "experts" told us not to label him. How horrible it would be to label a child. Let's get something straight right now. EVERYONE HAS A LABEL WHETHER THEY WANT IT OR NOT. There's the athlete, the smart kid, the pretty girl, the weird boy, etc... People are quick to give labels that they see as positive, but something like Asperger's? Not so much.
We moved ahead with testing and it was right after the DSM was changed to exclude Asperger's as a diagnosis so we weren't sure if they would see anything or be able to help. My son was diagnosed with ASD Level 1. We call it Asperger's because it seems much easier for people to grasp when it comes to him. But more importantly, the diagnosis gave us specifics. He needed help with expressive speech, occupational therapy for sensory issues and motor skills, and a safety contract because the bully issue in second grade was still affecting him. And not in a way that any parent wants to hear. We made the decision to change schools once again and he is happy and thriving in this school. They integrate occupational therapy, speech therapy, and were so helpful and accepting when his "fidgets" were diagnosed as Tourette Syndrome. Wow, the final piece of his puzzle was in place. Tourette Syndrome caused us more distress because the tics wax and wane and can actually affect his daily life. He has had to use a wheelchair because his tics were so bad at times. And we have to have an exit plan in place for church, movies, restaurants, etc because of his vocal tics.
Our journey towards any answers has been a long one. Some parents are able to find their answers sooner and faster than we did. I think that children like mine get a little lost in the shuffle when it comes to different abilities. He was never failing academically. In fact, he's ahead of his grade level. But he was failing in other ways that are just as important and no one was willing to listen. We would like to think that our journey has helped us be more understanding of other families and children going through struggles. My son is very empathetic towards others and thus the creation of the PierScience Foundation. When we learned that by him speaking openly about his triumphs and struggles helped him feel more positive towards himself, we encouraged him to speak up more. When we discovered how a simple weighted blanket could make such a difference to him, we wondered why all classrooms didn't have one. That child sitting in the classroom not focusing on his reading may just have a simple sensory issue. A weighted lap pad could help him focus on his vision and perhaps change his life. Yes, change his LIFE. Maybe he would have been written up as a lost cause, a child who would never be a good reader, maybe that one simple tool can change a child seen as a behavioral issue into what he really is. A child who needed a little help and who can now focus on his school work and perhaps go on to do great things!
I am here to support my child and his dream of helping others. He is giving talks and handing out weighted lap pads to preschools as well as donating weighted lap pads that he has made to others in need. As parents, my husband and I couldn't be more proud of him because we know where he has been and we can see where he is headed. He is going to change lives.
